2/28/2024 0 Comments Barney frank husband![]() There's a lot of personality that goes into it. The best thing I can say is this: Being effective in a legislative body has something in common with trying to be popular in high school. Now that's not just a matter of poetess, being an effective legislator is helped by being nicer to people. There was kind of a perennial, low-level bad mood because I was going around being mad at myself because of this self-denial and what it did. My colleagues told me, "You know what? You're easier to get along with now you're not grumpy as much you don't snap at people.". So I would have the strength to stop doing things like that."Īpparently, I got nicer and that's helpful. was after that became public, some of my friends said, "Oh, now we understand." What I said to them was, "Now you see how depraving this was to me, how it made me behave so irresponsibly - and that's why I had to come out. It was certainly irresponsible for me as a member of Congress to risk the causes I cared about by this. That relationship, even as I was maintaining it, I realized it was a bad idea. I had started seeing him in 1985 and it was in '85, '86 that I finally decided to come out. He then elaborated that and added various charges about I was letting him run a prostitution ring from my apartment. The fact that I had a relationship with a prostitute was of some interest. So he brooded about that for a couple of years and then he went to The Washington Times, this very conservative paper. been all over the papers in May of '87 so it was a little late for. And here's where the blackmail came in: His first instinct was to say, "I'll tell everybody you're gay.". I told I didn't need him anymore (that maybe was a little callous), but that the job I was paying him for wasn't going to exist and that was the end of it, he got very angry. And by that time I had come out and I had a relationship with Herb. And he started taking drugs again and he became kind of a jerk again. Then what happened, frankly, was his probation expired. He clearly understood my emotional state, my sense of emotional and physical frustration and basically he didn't see it as an ongoing sexual relationship he thought he could get me to accept that we had this really good friendship. What I later learned was he had been on heroin and had been arrested and had been on probation and he was forced to stay off drugs so he was on his very best behavior when I met him. And then, after a couple of times, he was very intelligent, well spoken. On his relationship with male prostitute Stephen Gobie and the resulting fallout The best humor is offered up by the stupidity of your opponents. My response was: "Well, it doesn't hurt any individual marriages, but despite that it somehow hurts the institution of marriage? That is an argument of someone who ought to be in an institution.". "The best humor is offered up by the stupidity of your opponents."Īnd one guy got up, Steve Largent from Oklahoma, and he said, "Well, I'll tell the gentleman this: No, it doesn't hurt my marriage, it doesn't hurt the marriage of other people here, but it hurts the institution of marriage." In a debate on the Defense of Marriage Act, I got on the floor and said, "I want to understand: How does the fact that I love another man hurt your marriage? What about my relations, voluntary relations with another guy in any way jeopardize your marriage?" I said, "I'll yield to any member of the House who wants to explain to me how what I would do would hurt your marriage." So had built their arguments on a false premise. because once Massachusetts broke the logjam and started same-sex marriage, it became undeniably clear that there were no adverse consequences. One of the reasons we were able to win this battle was. To be intellectually honest it should have been "We Don't Want Those People To Be Able To Get Together Act." But they had to come up with supposed negative social consequences. So came up with this notion, and that's why it's called the Defense of Marriage Act. But they couldn't come out and say that - it was not, at that time, acceptable respectable to say, "We don't like those people and we don't want them hanging out with each other and being happy." There were people who didn't like one of us the notion of two of us getting together and being happy was geometrically worse. In 2012, Frank married Jim Ready, becoming the first member of Congress to enter into a same-sex marriage. Barney Frank (left) came out of the closet in 1987 when he was in a relationship with Herb Moses (right).
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